The Harsh Reality: Looks Do Matter But Not As Much As You Think
Let’s address the elephant in the room: looks do matter to women. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either lying or delusional. A really hot guy with the same confidence and dating skills versus an average-looking dude with the same confidence. Who do you think wins? It’s simple really. But hold onto your socks, because here comes the plot twist.
The short answer? Yes—but not in the way you think.
As a dating coach, I’ve worked with men of all shapes, sizes, and styles, and here’s what I can tell you: while physical appearance plays a role in attraction, it’s not the be-all and end-all. The real truth is that women value much more than just their looks.
The great thing about being a guy is that a few very small changes to your appearance make a huge difference. While women often have to go all-out to achieve a big change, men can see substantial improvements with minimal effort as compared to women.
Guys value a girl’s physique, face, and looks a lot more than women value a guy’s physique, face, and looks.
The Reality of Looks
Whether we like it or not, physical appearance is one of the first things women notice and consider when evaluating a potential partner. It takes 5-7 seconds for someone to form an opinion about you based on how you look. If you’re struggling with weight, grooming issues, or any other aspect of your appearance, it can affect your success in attracting beautiful women. That part is true. BUT…
Here’s the deal: when a woman first meets you, your appearance will make an impact. Humans are visual creatures, and we’re wired to notice how someone looks. But here’s the catch—attraction isn’t just about having perfect facial features or a chiseled body.
What women notice most is how you present yourself. Are you confident? Are you well-groomed? Do you carry yourself with purpose? These things say a lot more about you than your jawline ever could.
What to Focus On:
- Style: You don’t need designer clothes, but wearing well-fitted, clean, and coordinated outfits shows you take pride in yourself.
- Grooming: A neat haircut, clean nails, and good hygiene are non-negotiable.
- Posture: Stand tall, shoulders back, and make eye contact—it exudes confidence.
The “But” Syndrome
Unlike men who value beauty highly when it comes to dating, women don’t rate it that high. Most men would not date women they don’t find physically attractive. Now in the case of women, they tend to value the entire package you bring to the table more than just looks. Sure, they’ll notice if you resemble a Greek god, but they’re also interested in what’s lurking beneath the surface. Your personality, your wit, your charm – all that good stuff. But don’t get it twisted. Looks still play a starring role in the grand theater of attraction. When a woman considers your value, looks are pretty high on the list. So if you are overweight, smelly, acne-prone, dress like a slob, poorly groomed, skinny, etc., you will struggle to attract beautiful women. The phrase “looks don’t matter” is a lie. Women do care about looks, but they also care about the rest of you.
Women care more about what you make them feel vs how you look. If you can make them feel attracted to you, then you win. It’s a pretty simple concept. Stop listening to guys on the internet who keep spamming the 6-6-6 rule. They have not gone out of their basements and actually talked to girls. For those who don’t know 6-6-6 is a popular internet slang that red pill guys use to say that women only want guys with six figures, six feet height, and six-pack abs.
Now does being tall, rich, and having six-pack abs help attract women? Of course, it helps. But that’s not the only thing women care about. There are a lot of women who love dad bods as well. There are a lot of women who love short guys as well.
You’ve probably heard it a million times, but confidence really is king. A guy who feels good in his own skin and projects self-assurance is far more attractive than a man who relies solely on his looks.
Why? Because confidence signals strength, security, and independence—all qualities women find irresistible.
Here’s the kicker: confidence isn’t about arrogance or pretending to be someone you’re not. It’s about embracing who you are, flaws and all, and showing up with authenticity.
What to Focus On:
- Work on building self-esteem by setting and achieving personal goals.
- Practice self-awareness and learn to accept your imperfections—they make you human.
- Engage in activities that make you feel good about yourself, whether it’s fitness, hobbies, or improving your skills.
The Power of Small Changes
If you as a guy get your act together, drop some weight, fix your fashion style, and work on your grooming, your results will skyrocket. Most men suck at marketing themselves. Once you fix the marketing part, you are solid. Remember the goal is to be the best version of yourself that you can be. Just because you are short or bald should not stop you from getting beautiful girls.
But saying looks are everything when it comes to dating is equally ridiculous. I’ve seen all sorts of guys – chubby, balding, ugly, and skinny – getting laid with hot girls because they had the confidence and dating skills to make the girls attracted to them.
Thats the goal. You change what you can and accept what you can’t. Thats what makes us human. If you want more help with overcoming limiting beliefs and self-esteem issues book a call with our coaches. They will help you find a detailed plan to help you out.
Women are drawn to the entire picture, not just the cover. Sure, a well-dressed man with a great smile might catch her eye, but it’s your personality, energy, and character that keep her interested.
What really matters? How you treat her, how you make her feel, and whether you have shared values and chemistry.
What to Focus On:
- Charm: Treating her (and others) in a charming, fun, and respectable way. It goes a long way.
- Humor: A good sense of humor is one of the most attractive traits you can have.
- Ambition: Women admire men who are driven and passionate about their goals.
The Makeover Plan
If you look like a homeless guy, then you need to fix that shit ASAP. Looking your best should be priority number one. Take six months, hell, take a year off from chasing women, and focus on yourself. Hit the gym, clean up your diet, fix your grooming, and update your wardrobe. You’ll save time in the long run.
Lucky for you, you are a guy. Guys can easily do a full body makeover just by going to the gym regularly, eating healthy, wearing the proper clothes that fit you, and taking care of your grooming. It sounds simple but the hardest part is committing to improving yourself. Are you actually willing to put in the effort to become the best version of yourself? Or are you just saying yes without actually meaning it?
Here’s a secret: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What one woman finds attractive might not appeal to another, and that’s okay. You don’t need to appeal to everyone—just the right person.
Women are less concerned with whether you fit society’s idea of “handsome” and more focused on whether you’re attractive to them. That’s why things like chemistry, charisma, and personality carry so much weight. Women aren’t necessarily looking for a six-pack—they’re looking for someone who values their well-being and leads an active, fulfilling life.
The Importance of Sexual Market Value
In the game of dating, it’s essential to understand the concept of sexual market value (SMV). Your SMV encompasses not only your looks but also your job, lifestyle, social circle, personality, and overall presentation. Improving your SMV involves working on all aspects of your life to increase your desirability to potential partners. It’s not just about your looks but about the whole package – your personality, job/career, your lifestyle, your social circle etc
The higher your SMV, the more women you will attract towards you. While being charming and confident is important if you couple it with doing your best to look good by taking care of grooming, style, and other parts of your looks, you really become the hot 10 women desire.
The most attractive men are those who are comfortable being the best version of themselves. They’re genuine, honest, and unafraid to show their true colors.
Taking Action
And here’s the kicker: you gotta take action, my friend. You can’t just sit at home and expect women to come flocking to you like moths to a flame. Hit the gym, revamp your fashion and wardrobe, and learn how to style and groom yourself to look your best.
If you’re serious about leveling up your dating game, it’s time to take action. Invest in yourself by taking action to be the best version of yourself. Remember, attracting high-quality women requires more than just charm – it requires a holistic approach to self-improvement and being the complete man that women desire. Looks do matter. So does your charm, confidence, your choice of friends, your fashion sense, your hobbies, talents, and lifestyle. It all adds up to make you a complete package. Just because you don’t look like a movie star doesn’t mean you’re destined to settle for less in the dating world. By putting in the effort to enhance your appearance and develop your personality, you can elevate your dating game to levels you didn’t know were possible.
Conclusion
So, what’s the takeaway here? Looks matter. But they’re not the whole game. Confidence, personality, game, fashion sense, and putting in the numbers are crucial too. But if you want to make your life easier, get your looks in check. Work on yourself, improve your appearance, learn how to dress better, and watch how your results improve. It’s about being the version of yourself. So, get out there, put in the work, and take no prisoners.
If you still feel you need help or that you cannot do it by yourself. Thats completely okay. Thats what dating coaches are for. Do you want to discover the qualities that truly captivate women and make you unforgettable? As a seasoned dating coach, I’ve spent years understanding what women genuinely desire in a partner. Now, I’m ready to share these insights with you.
Inside, you’ll discover:
- The key traits that make women naturally drawn to you
- Proven strategies to boost your confidence and charisma
- Essential tips for mastering the art of conversation and connection
- Practical advice for refining your personal style and presentation
- Relation Management skills so women want to stay with you forever
But that’s not all. To kickstart your journey to becoming the best version of yourself, I’m offering a FREE consultation call. During this call, we’ll discuss your dating challenges and craft a personalized plan to elevate your appeal and success with women.
Don’t let another opportunity pass you by. Embrace the attractive qualities women love and transform your dating life today!
Book your FREE call now and take the first step towards becoming the man you’ve always wanted to be.
