Mastering the art of dating and attracting women can feel like an impossible task, especially if you’re just starting out with dating and talking to women.
Starting your journey in dating can feel like stepping into uncharted territory. You want to connect with women, build meaningful relationships, and exude confidence, but where do you even begin? For many men, this process feels overwhelming, and the fear of rejection or saying the wrong thing can hold them back.
But here’s the truth: getting good with women isn’t about being born with natural charm or memorizing pickup lines. It’s a skill—and like any skill, it can be learned, practiced, and refined over time.
As a dating coach, I’ve worked with beginners who’ve gone from feeling lost to confidently navigating the world of dating. If you’re ready to make progress, here’s your guide to getting good with women, one step at a time. This guide will provide you with a step-by-step approach to help you navigate the dating world in a way that makes sense to you as a guy.
Step 1: Put All Non-Woman, Non-Fitness Projects on Hold
To start, you need to focus. Temporarily put aside any financial, educational, spiritual, or travel goals. Your primary objective for the next few months is to improve your dating life. This intense focus will help you see faster results.
This does not mean you stop working or anything extreme like that. But it does mean that you need to spend a time of your day improving your skills with women and actually taking action.
Confidence is one of the most attractive traits a man can have, but it’s not about faking bravado—it’s about genuinely valuing who you are. This means focusing on personal growth, building self-esteem, and creating a life that excites you. Women are drawn to men who have their own passions and goals because it shows they’re independent and fulfilled.
Getting good with women isn’t just about romantic interactions—it’s about being socially comfortable in general. Great conversationalists are good with women because they know how to listen, engage, and make others feel at ease.
Start practicing your social skills in low-pressure environments. Talk to the barista at your favorite coffee shop, strike up conversations with coworkers, or chat with strangers in casual settings.
Step 2: Lose Excess Weight
If you’re more than 15 pounds overweight, it’s time to shed those extra pounds. Here’s how:
- Calculate Your BMR/TDEE: Use an online calculator to determine your Basal Metabolic Rate (BMR) or Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE).
- Track Calories: Download a calorie-tracking app and use it religiously. Aim for a mild daily caloric deficit.
- Measure Your Food: Use measuring cups and a kitchen scale to track every bite.
- Avoid Grains and Potatoes: Except on cheat days, cut out grain-based and potato-based foods.
By following these steps, you’ll start losing weight quickly. Some people can drop 10-15 pounds within the first week or two. You can refer to online guides and courses to lose weight if needed. The goal is to be fit and healthy. The healthier you are the better you will feel about yourself.
Step 3: Start Lifting Weights
If you’re not already lifting weights, now is the time to start. You don’t need to become a bodybuilder, but you should aim to build some muscle to boost your confidence and attractiveness. Either get a gym membership or buy a band resistance set for home workouts.
There are plenty of good gyms everywhere. Ask your friends who are in shape for help if you need it.
By getting in shape and being healthy your confidence and attractiveness will go up quite a lot. Take time and effort to improve your physique. Gym is probably the best therapy for men.
Step 4: Address Your Height Concerns
Many men are insecure about height and rightfully so since many women tend to judge based on height. Now is height the only thing that matters? Of course not. But it is still one of the factors that people subconsciously react to.
Here are 5 practical things to look taller
- If you’re under 5’5” consider using shoe lifts to mitigate your height disadvantage. These can add a couple of inches and boost your confidence when meeting women.
- You can also wear clothes that make you appear taller. Avoid loose and oversized clothes they make you look short. You can research what suits you the best or get one of our coaches to help you.
- Have a hairstyle that makes you an inch or two taller. Hair also adds height when you have a decent hairstyle
- Fix your body posture. Most men have horrible body postures that make them look 1-2 inches shorter than they actually are. Practice good body postures. Keep your back straight. Working out in the gym will also improve your body posture. Working out and eating healthy can also help you increase your height if you are younger. So definitely don’t miss out on this.
- Wear less contrasting colors so you look taller
Now can you get with women regardless of height? Of course. Your Height should not stop you from being confident. There are many short guys with really hot girlfriends and wives. The above tips are just to help you get some added bonus.
Step 5: Upgrade Your Wardrobe
Go shopping with two women under the age of 30 and have them help you pick out one or two stylish outfits. Your date outfits should fit well and complement your appearance. Check Instagram and Pinterest for fashion ideas.
Having a good fashion sense is very attractive to women. And you look amazing so why not. Another key factor is grooming. I can’t stress this enough. Make sure to keep your hair in shape, and your nails cut and for the love of god shower regularly. The last thing you wanna do is to smell bad.
While looks aren’t everything, how you present yourself matters. Dressing well, grooming regularly, and staying fit show that you take care of yourself—and that’s attractive. You don’t need a designer wardrobe or a gym membership to make an impact. Just focus on being clean, neat, and intentional about your appearance.
If you feel you are really struggling with fashion and grooming then you can book a free coaching call with us and we will be more than happy to help you get sorted with everything related to fashion, grooming, and dating.
Step 6: Choose Your Dating Method
Pick one dating method to focus on: night game, day game, or online dating. Don’t spread yourself too thin by trying all three. Choose what suits you the best. Here is a quick guide on the pros and cons of different dating methods.
Choose a style that suits your personality and lifestyle. And stick to it. Get good at it. If you need help choosing the right dating style for you then get a coach to help you out.
Spend a week researching your chosen method, reading ebooks, and online courses on YouTube, and developing a detailed action plan. We can help you with a custom plan as well if you need it.
Step 7: Take Action
After your research week, dive into action:
- Night/Day Game: Approach 100 women as quickly as possible.
- Online Dating: Send 350 openers to women. Spread these across multiple dating sites if needed.
Don’t stop until you’ve reached your target number. To get good at something you need to take action. This is the hardest but also the most important part. Get comfortable being uncomfortable as they say.
This is where dating coaches can help you the most. You can definitely do things yourself but it will take a lot longer to do. Maybe even years. Why waste years of your life when you can get a dating coach to help you fix your problems in a few months.
Step 8: Track Your Results
Keep detailed records of your interactions. Track metrics such as response rates, phone numbers, dates, and successful hookups. This data will help you understand what’s working and what isn’t.
Always get into the habit of journaling your experience and journey. You need to find what works for you and what doesn’t.
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results – Albert Einstein
Step 9: Review and Adjust
After reaching your initial targets, review your results. Identify what worked and what didn’t, then make necessary adjustments. Continue this cycle of action, review, and adjustment to continually improve your success rates until you become really good with women.
This can be a daunting task to do solo that’s why a community and dating coaches are the best way to do this instead of being alone. You have partners and people supporting you in your journey of becoming good with women. Thats when you will truly shine.
Step 10: Maintain and Persevere
Continue refining your approach for at least six months, preferably a year. Keep lifting weights and maintaining your diet. Allow yourself occasional cheat days, but stay focused on your long-term goals.
The people you surround yourself with have a huge impact on your mindset. If your friends or influences are negative, it can drag you down. Surround yourself with people who uplift, challenge, and encourage you to grow.
Once you have taken the required action steps you will get the results you are looking for. And as always if you need help then don’t be afraid to reach out. We are here to help you.
Conclusion
As hard and daunting as it may seem as a beginner all things worth having in life don’t come easy. So, put in the work, stay consistent, and enjoy the process of becoming more attractive and confident with women. Remember your goal is to be the best version of you.
But that’s not all. To kickstart your journey to becoming the best version of yourself, I’m offering a FREE consultation call. During this call, we’ll discuss your dating challenges and craft a personalized plan to elevate your appeal and success with women.
Don’t let another opportunity pass you by. Embrace the attractive qualities women love and transform your dating life today!
Book your FREE call now and take the first step towards becoming the man you’ve always wanted to be.
